24. ForGIVE You- How to Move on, up, and forward from your mistakes.


Heart AF Episode 24!
Have you ever felt stuck or frozen in your progress because of a mistake you made? Got too emotional, didn't follow your plan like you wanted?
Self guilt can be a really nasty block for us. Preventing us from growing and moving forward to reach our goals. It prevents us from being open to manifesting and seeing miracles.
Guilt is a very heavy and low vibrational energy.
You have to pick yourself up and move forward.
And the first step to healing that block is FORGIVENESS.
You have to forgive yourself and MOVE ON!
Quit looking back and keeping yourself stuck in the past.
It's happened, it's done, it's time to bless it, forgive, and move forward towards the future.
To working your way up the vibrational scale to RISE UP and attract better.
No one is perfect. We are all completely LOVED and whole no matter what.
You are NOT alone
Miracles are real.
You've got this. Rise Up. Keep Going.
#beyou #nothingtoprove #recognizeyourbrilliance #miraclesarereal #youvegotthis #keepgoing #forgiveness #forgiveyou #noapologies #knowyourworth #vibehigh #riseabove #raiseyourvibe #selfworth #youarestrong #youaredivine #youareworthy #affirm #rememberwhoyouare #rememberwhothefuckyouare #healingoldwounds #healingjourney #heartaf #theheartafpodcast #podcast #youarenotalone #youareloved #youareworthit #standtall #ownit
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Hey everyone, what's up?
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It's Chelsea VanBuskirk
with the Heart AF podcast.
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Hope you guys are all doing well.
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So I had a situation that prompted an
idea for a podcast episode, so here we go.
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Um, I went off on somebody in the heat
of the moment while I was angry and
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um, I sent an email and I'm notorious
to sending emails because I tend to
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get my thoughts out better in writing
versus speaking because when I speak in
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the moment, it's probably a lot worse.
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Um, actually, you know what, honestly,
the email that I wrote was speech
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to text, so it was speaking, which
is probably why it was so bad.
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And the thing of it is I was in
the heat of the moment, right?
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Emotions were at that high level you
know, logical reasoning was not a
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part of any of what I was saying.
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I was fueled by emotional
anger and hit the send button.
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Why?
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I don't know.
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I'm still mad at myself for hitting
send because I shouldn't have, I, it
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was, it was not my best moment, right?
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But, um, it happens.
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I'm human, right?
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We all have moments that we do things
in the heat of the moment, right?
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When our emotions are high, we
might make mistakes or we might say
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things that we don't really mean.
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Um, we might hurt feelings.
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Anyway, what I did, I
immediately regretted it.
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Like, and especially as
I started cooling down.
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That, you know, logical reasoning.
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Part of my brain started, you
know, being activated and I'm
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like, wow, I really should not
have said all the things I said.
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Like I needed to be more logical
about how I was responding.
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Um, instead of responding
straight in that emotional.
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High point where I wasn't really
thinking so clearly, right?
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So I went back and read what I wrote and
I'm like, oh, is there a way to unsend it?
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And there is a way to unsend
your shit, by the way.
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Um, but you have to do it very quickly.
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Um, you have five seconds on a mobile
device, and I think you have, um,
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up to 30 seconds on your computer.
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So, uh, just a little tidbit with Gmail.
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There is, um, a settings feature in
your Gmail or your Google settings
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where you can delay that, um, to
give yourself a little bit more time.
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I think, I think that, I can't remember,
but definitely on your cell phone you
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only have five seconds, so you better
like know what you're gonna say and
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then make sure you really wanna send it
when you hit send on your mobile device.
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But on the computer
you have a little time.
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You know, most of the time if you do
use Gmail, it'll pop up and say, You
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know, message to, and there's like a
little button where you can hit undo.
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So I guess the time frame you can, um,
set that to be a little bit longer.
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I don't know what the maximum amount
of time, it's not a lot, but you
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can maximize it in your settings.
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So new, new information in case you
didn't know that fact might wanna give
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yourself as much time as possible just
in case you run into a situation like me.
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But for me, I didn't really get
to the logical part of, maybe I
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shouldn't have sent that till it
was at least 15 minutes past and
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then there was nothing I could do.
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It was out there, it was sent.
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It had been done, the deed had
been done, it had been carried out.
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So after I realized I couldn't
really undo it, I was like, shoot.
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So actually I didn't say Shoot.
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I don't say shoot.
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I say shit.
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So I said, shit, well, what am I gonna do?
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So I apologized.
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I reached out to the person, I sent
the email and I said, look, I wrote
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that email in the heat of the moment.
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I really shouldn't have sent it.
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It was something that I was just
getting everything out that I
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was a feeling in that moment
and I should not have sent that.
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That was not, um, you know,
professional or respectful, whatever.
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I don't remember what I
said, but I apologized.
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I owned up to it.
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Said sorry.
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Shouldn't have handled things that way.
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Um, and here's the thing.
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We're all human.
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We all make mistakes.
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It's part of life.
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But we can sometimes get so
hard on ourselves and be really
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angry at ourselves, and let that
bring us down and start dragging
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us into this downward spiral.
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Spiral of, you know, Self-pity.
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Uh, I'm a failure.
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Why do I do things this way?
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I'm always messing up.
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I never get it right.
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Like, you know, I'm, I'm
always such an angry person.
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I'm never gonna change.
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Like, we can get in this like, mind
fuck of just really berating ourselves.
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We really are our own
worst critics, right?
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Like, our self-talk is our worst.
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, we are our own worst enemy, right?
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It's those thoughts in our head and
what we tell ourselves and, and so,
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it's a slippery slope where we just
kind of lay into ourselves, right?
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The hardest person to
forgive is ourselves.
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You know, I did that episode, no
apologies, uh, a few weeks back, which
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was more about, you know, when somebody's
wrong to you and you don't get the
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apology, apology you deserve, right?
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Um, and how you can kind of get
closure and move on from that.
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You gotta do the same thing with yourself,
but you gotta forgive yourself, right?
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Like you, you do have the
power to forgive yourself.
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So that's what this episode is about.
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It's about learning to forgive yourself.
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So if you mess up, if you cause
somebody pain, you're in the wrong,
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you act, you know irrationally
in the heat of the moment, right?
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It's okay.
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You're human.
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It's normal.
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Everybody does it.
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Nobody's perfect, right?
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We all have our flaws.
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We all make mistakes.
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Apologize if you need to apologize.
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. Own up.
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Own it.
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Own what you did, and know that doesn't
make you a horrible person just because
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you make a mistake or you did one thing.
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Maybe you did multiple
things where you messed up.
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It doesn't mean you're
a horrible person, okay?
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You own up to it and you move on, right?
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That's the trick is moving on, letting go.
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Don't let whatever you do or did drag you
down or keep you stuck and immobilized
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and just suck you into that downward
spiral where you're you know, falling
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into that negative self-talk and falling
into those l lower vibrational feelings.
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And when you're in that lower
vibrational state, guess what?
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You're attracting lower vibrational
opportunities to come towards you.
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Right?
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Like it's, it's just,
it's a suction, right?
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Like it's a, it's energy
attraction, right?
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Like when you get sucked into that low
vibrational state, like that's what you're
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gonna be attracting back into your life.
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You need to stop it right there
and start circling back up.
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Right?
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I have this really great image.
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I'm gonna, I'll share it with you guys.
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I, I made it for my book.
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Essentially, you have this, the,
the highest rungs, these, these
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wide highest rungs right here.
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The higher vibrational thoughts and
feelings and experiences, right?
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And at that high vibe level,
that's what you're gonna attract.
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But you start going down these lower
rungs and you start having, Lower
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vibrational feelings and thoughts, and
then you kind of get it, get spirals
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down into this middle, and then it starts
getting bigger and bigger to where you're
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having like anger, jealousy, right?
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Like low self-worth.
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That's all here, but, but you can't see
vibrating at these lower energies down
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here and you wanna keep rising back up.
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You wanna keep, rise yourself back
up and go up that, that spiral to
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where you can start vibrating up here.
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. Um, and so it really, it really
becomes where you have to, you have
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to forgive yourself and move on.
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You cannot be stuck.
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You cannot stay stuck.
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Um, and the thing is, is like
you don't grow without mistakes.
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You can't reach success.
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You can't get any better than where you're
at right now unless you make mistakes.
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Sometimes we're so afraid of failure
that we just stop and we stop trying.
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We, we just stay stuck in wherever
we're at and we don't grow and thrive
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and experience success in the things
we wanna do because we keep ourselves
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stuck and, and sometimes I really have,
I think it has to do with like guilt
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or not feeling like we're good enough
because we've made mistakes or whatever.
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And it's bull shit.
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It's bullshit.
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Everybody makes mistakes.
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No one's perfect.
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It's about learning where you
made that mistake and how you can
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improve and how you can do better.
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And you're not gonna know how to
do better until you mess up, right?
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Like every experience we go through is an
opportunity to learn and grow from, right.
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Each time that we fail,
we learn something.
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We either learn what not to do, right,
or we learn how to try something
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different , we learn how maybe
that's not the person we wanna be.
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Right?
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Each day is a new opportunity.
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You don't need to wait for a new Monday,
you don't need to wait for a new year.
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You don't need to wait for a new month.
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Right?
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I've, I've, I've talked about
that in a recent post too.
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Alls you need is a one new moment.
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One new moment to change your
mind, like you can change your mind
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and change your thought patterns
in any instant, you choose.
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You get to decide when it's like
enough is enough and you're ready
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to grow and ready to move on.
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Because once you start learning,
and once you, when you know better,
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you get to do better, right?
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So like, honestly, like whether it's you
know, business, whether it's your health,
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whether it's just your self-development,
your self-growth, like it's okay to fail.
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It's okay to mess up because
that's how you learn.
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And, and like I talked about last
week, you only fail when you give up.
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Right?
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When you stop altogether, when
you keep yourself stuck, when you
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decide to give up, like keep going.
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Own it.
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Own it and let it go.
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Right?
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Apologize.
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Do whatever you need to
do, like own the situation.
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Don't, don't try to run away from
the mistakes you've made, right?
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Like, it's okay.
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It's okay.
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, own up to what you did.
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Own up to whatever it is, and
then move on from it, right?
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It's in the past.
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You don't have to look in the, don't look
in the rear of your mirror, like, right?
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You don't need to keep
looking towards your past.
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You need to look forward.
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If you're, if you're focused on the
past, you're never gonna move forward.
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It's gonna keep you back, right?
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It's gonna keep you stuck in these
moments, like always worried about
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what happened, what I could have
done, what I should have done.
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All right?
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And you really have to work hard
to to, to get your mind focused
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on what's coming forward, right?
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What's in the present moment?
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What can I do now?
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You can't change the past.
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It's happened.
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It's done.
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Move on.
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You can change the future, right?
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You can change the future by what
you decide to do in this moment.
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And so I really, I'm asking
you guys to forgive yourself.
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Allow yourself grace, allow yourself
the opportunity to grow and
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learn from each new experience.
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Like go for it.
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Okay?
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Like it's scary to, to change and
to go after your dreams, right?
226
00:10:19,490 --> 00:10:23,325
And we can be so afraid of failing
or feeling like we don't deserve
227
00:10:23,330 --> 00:10:25,755
success or feeling like whatever.
228
00:10:26,025 --> 00:10:30,015
But like I've said before, any desire
you have in your heart was placed
229
00:10:30,555 --> 00:10:32,295
in your heart for a reason, right?
230
00:10:32,295 --> 00:10:34,955
Like the desires, the dreams
you have, that's not a mistake.
231
00:10:36,225 --> 00:10:37,185
It's meant for you.
232
00:10:37,185 --> 00:10:38,175
It's already here.
233
00:10:38,175 --> 00:10:40,515
And you really have to believe
that, and you have to keep that
234
00:10:40,515 --> 00:10:44,025
forward focus and know it's okay
that if you fall down, right, but
235
00:10:44,025 --> 00:10:45,615
you get back up and you keep going.
236
00:10:46,425 --> 00:10:48,375
We just celebrated Martin
Luther King Day recently.
237
00:10:48,375 --> 00:10:52,275
One of his, uh, famous quotes is, um,
you know, and I'm gonna paraphrase
238
00:10:52,280 --> 00:10:57,930
it, but you know, if you, if you can't
run walk, and if you can't walk,
239
00:10:57,930 --> 00:11:00,300
crawl right, but you just keep moving.
240
00:11:00,480 --> 00:11:00,780
Right?
241
00:11:00,840 --> 00:11:03,690
And I don't care if you're barely
scooting along, like you don't
242
00:11:03,690 --> 00:11:06,600
have the energy because you've
been knocked down so many times.
243
00:11:06,840 --> 00:11:10,290
I don't care if you're army crawling
and barely slithering on the ground.
244
00:11:10,565 --> 00:11:11,585
Like, keep moving.
245
00:11:11,585 --> 00:11:12,395
You don't stop.
246
00:11:12,395 --> 00:11:12,785
Right?
247
00:11:12,845 --> 00:11:14,015
And you just do just enough.
248
00:11:14,015 --> 00:11:17,255
Like just until you can keep going,
until you get stronger and get better.
249
00:11:17,495 --> 00:11:20,705
Pick yourself up to start crawling,
and then you're crawling, and then
250
00:11:20,975 --> 00:11:22,295
you know you're gonna get stronger.
251
00:11:22,295 --> 00:11:24,215
And then finally be able to
feel like you're good enough
252
00:11:24,215 --> 00:11:25,835
to stand up and start walking.
253
00:11:26,075 --> 00:11:28,055
And then you're slowly
walking until soon enough
254
00:11:28,105 --> 00:11:28,735
you'll be running.
255
00:11:28,765 --> 00:11:29,275
Right?
256
00:11:29,335 --> 00:11:31,165
Like it takes time.
257
00:11:31,165 --> 00:11:32,185
We gotta have patience.
258
00:11:32,185 --> 00:11:33,885
That's the other thing
is we're always, so.
259
00:11:34,450 --> 00:11:37,420
Wanting things right now, and I
can give you a great example of my
260
00:11:37,420 --> 00:11:38,440
health and fitness journey, right?
261
00:11:38,440 --> 00:11:39,850
I've been sharing that
with you guys, right?
262
00:11:39,910 --> 00:11:44,750
Um, that's something I'm
very vulnerable about, is this
263
00:11:44,755 --> 00:11:46,130
weight loss I'm going on, right?
264
00:11:46,130 --> 00:11:49,220
Like, I have 20 pounds
I'm trying to lose, right?
265
00:11:49,280 --> 00:11:52,430
Like, that number sounds
really big and scary to me.
266
00:11:52,430 --> 00:11:56,300
Now, that might not sound big and scary
to some people, but for me it is okay.
267
00:11:56,300 --> 00:12:01,295
It's challenging because I wanna see
that scale move and it's not moving very.
268
00:12:02,600 --> 00:12:04,310
You know, and that's frustrating.
269
00:12:04,520 --> 00:12:09,650
And, um, you know, I'm doing my best
to stay within like, my goals of,
270
00:12:09,650 --> 00:12:12,850
you know, what I'm trying to aim for
nutritionally, like, um, staying within
271
00:12:13,565 --> 00:12:16,745
the nutritional parameters I have for
myself that I'm working on with my coach.
272
00:12:16,745 --> 00:12:19,865
Like, you know, I'm not eliminating
anything in my diet, but I'm
273
00:12:19,865 --> 00:12:23,945
shooting to reach, you know, certain,
um, grams of protein each day.
274
00:12:24,275 --> 00:12:26,675
Um, and that's kind of my main
focus right now is just staying
275
00:12:26,675 --> 00:12:29,255
in kind of a calorie range and
hitting those protein goals, right?
276
00:12:29,255 --> 00:12:32,075
Because I'm trying to build
back up my lean muscle mass.
277
00:12:32,630 --> 00:12:34,580
And, um, and it's hard, right?
278
00:12:34,580 --> 00:12:37,490
I gotta, I gotta show up every
day to myself and it's hard.
279
00:12:37,490 --> 00:12:44,655
And, um, there was a day, maybe two
where I went over, like my weakness
280
00:12:44,655 --> 00:12:50,345
is I have a sweet tooth and I might
have eaten a half a pan of brownies.
281
00:12:50,715 --> 00:12:51,225
I did.
282
00:12:51,225 --> 00:12:57,825
I mean, I just, I had a weak moment and I
couldn't stop and I just, , I overate and,
283
00:12:57,885 --> 00:12:59,865
and I felt like shit afterwards, right?
284
00:12:59,865 --> 00:13:01,305
Like my stomach hurt afterwards.
285
00:13:01,305 --> 00:13:02,355
I was like, why did I do that?
286
00:13:02,355 --> 00:13:05,025
But they tasted so good
and like, blah, blah, blah.
287
00:13:05,025 --> 00:13:07,215
But then of course, you know,
then the guilt sets in, right?
288
00:13:07,215 --> 00:13:08,415
Because, oh, I just messed up.
289
00:13:08,415 --> 00:13:11,470
I went over, uh, I was over
my calorie goal for that day
290
00:13:11,475 --> 00:13:13,030
because of the brownie incident.
291
00:13:14,050 --> 00:13:17,590
, but I knew logically, like it didn't
matter in the scheme of things
292
00:13:17,590 --> 00:13:18,880
as long as I kept going, right?
293
00:13:18,880 --> 00:13:23,260
I show up the next day and I keep,
you know, doing as best I can to stay
294
00:13:23,265 --> 00:13:28,510
within , my allotted, um, you know,
bank of, uh, calories for the day
295
00:13:28,510 --> 00:13:31,510
and still working at trying to get
the nutrients my body needs, right?
296
00:13:31,510 --> 00:13:35,290
To fuel my body correctly so that
I can lift the weights I wanna lift
297
00:13:35,290 --> 00:13:37,930
and make sure I'm like growing the
muscle that I wanna grow, right?
298
00:13:37,930 --> 00:13:39,970
To get my body shape to change and.
299
00:13:41,155 --> 00:13:43,585
. I didn't give up, but it was
still frustrating, right?
300
00:13:43,585 --> 00:13:44,755
I still was mad at myself.
301
00:13:44,755 --> 00:13:45,775
I still curse myself.
302
00:13:45,775 --> 00:13:51,165
And, you know, um, part of the program
I'm on is I am weighing myself every
303
00:13:51,165 --> 00:13:52,425
day, but there's intention with that.
304
00:13:52,425 --> 00:13:55,935
It's not to, to be obsessed with
the scale, it's just data tracking.
305
00:13:55,935 --> 00:13:56,295
Right?
306
00:13:56,325 --> 00:14:00,195
And the thing is, it's desensitizing
me to the scale because it changes
307
00:14:00,195 --> 00:14:01,275
and it's gonna go up and down.
308
00:14:01,605 --> 00:14:04,785
Um, and every good, um, you
know, nutrition or fitness
309
00:14:04,785 --> 00:14:08,235
coach should tell you this, that
weight loss is not linear, right?
310
00:14:08,235 --> 00:14:10,875
It's not a straight line that
just shows you going down.
311
00:14:10,905 --> 00:14:12,045
It goes like this.
312
00:14:12,105 --> 00:14:14,775
It looks like a heart rate
monitor, it's gonna spike up and
313
00:14:14,775 --> 00:14:16,035
it's gonna wiggle up and down.
314
00:14:16,275 --> 00:14:19,785
But the thing is, you'll start to see a
gradual trend downward if your body's
315
00:14:19,790 --> 00:14:21,405
responding, you'll see a gradual.
316
00:14:21,685 --> 00:14:26,095
Um, slope, you know, downwards
of, um, you know, weight loss
317
00:14:26,095 --> 00:14:27,205
if that's the goal, right?
318
00:14:27,505 --> 00:14:29,365
Um, but it's not gonna be linear, right?
319
00:14:29,365 --> 00:14:31,825
Like, you're not gonna have
points that make a perfect line.
320
00:14:31,825 --> 00:14:33,115
It's gonna be like this.
321
00:14:33,115 --> 00:14:34,555
And so my weight is like that.
322
00:14:34,555 --> 00:14:37,405
And you know what, it is kind of
disheartening a little bit when you,
323
00:14:37,435 --> 00:14:40,825
I've been on track a hundred percent
and I get up and the scale goes up.
324
00:14:41,550 --> 00:14:42,600
That sucks, right?
325
00:14:42,600 --> 00:14:43,560
Like that's a mind fuck.
326
00:14:43,560 --> 00:14:44,940
And you're like, well,
shit, it's not working.
327
00:14:44,940 --> 00:14:48,060
But I'm like working so hard,
like why isn't it not showing?
328
00:14:48,660 --> 00:14:52,110
But I know, and you know, that's the
purpose of having that coach to kind
329
00:14:52,115 --> 00:14:55,020
of be that motivator and help you
stay accountable and letting you know
330
00:14:55,020 --> 00:14:57,450
to keep going and trust the process.
331
00:14:57,455 --> 00:14:57,690
Right?
332
00:14:57,690 --> 00:15:00,720
Because it is gonna fluctuate and
it is gonna, you know, it will be
333
00:15:00,720 --> 00:15:04,400
disheartening to see the scale go
up, but I have that faith with my
334
00:15:04,400 --> 00:15:07,610
coach and with myself just with the
experience cuz I know it, it is logical.
335
00:15:07,610 --> 00:15:09,110
Like I know what to do, right?
336
00:15:09,110 --> 00:15:12,110
Like I've done body building, I've won
first place in body building shows.
337
00:15:12,115 --> 00:15:16,700
I know what to do to change my
physique, but it's just doing it in a
338
00:15:16,700 --> 00:15:18,380
sustainable way, one which is different.
339
00:15:18,770 --> 00:15:22,700
Um, and also just having that
accountability and encouragement to keep
340
00:15:22,700 --> 00:15:26,375
going and to like keep me, accountable and
in line with what is really important to
341
00:15:26,375 --> 00:15:31,535
me, which is, you know, to feel good in
my clothes and to be fueling my body with
342
00:15:31,535 --> 00:15:34,835
nutrients that it can use and like help
it, you know, grow in the ways it needs
343
00:15:34,835 --> 00:15:36,935
to grow, you know, and just being healthy.
344
00:15:37,295 --> 00:15:40,625
Um, anyway, so it's, it's really
helpful to have that coach.
345
00:15:40,625 --> 00:15:43,235
But yeah, it's disheartening
when you see the scale go up.
346
00:15:43,235 --> 00:15:44,015
But again, it's.
347
00:15:45,415 --> 00:15:47,150
. Just staying the course, right?
348
00:15:47,155 --> 00:15:50,540
And just staying day after day,
showing up, staying consistent.
349
00:15:50,730 --> 00:15:52,500
every day is not gonna be
a hundred percent perfect.
350
00:15:52,500 --> 00:15:55,690
It's not, I just told you I ate like
half a pan of brownies, right?
351
00:15:55,690 --> 00:15:57,910
Like that's not staying a
hundred percent on track, right?
352
00:15:59,260 --> 00:16:01,330
But it's mostly on track, right?
353
00:16:01,330 --> 00:16:02,680
And it's staying consistent.
354
00:16:02,680 --> 00:16:06,580
And it's when I have the bad days
with the, where I ate that, that I got
355
00:16:06,580 --> 00:16:09,340
back up the next day and still kept
going and working towards my goals.
356
00:16:09,340 --> 00:16:13,960
I didn't give up, I didn't go and
slash all three of my tires, right?
357
00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:17,920
Because the one was got the flat, like,
like that analogy I used before, right?
358
00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:18,280
Like.
359
00:16:18,685 --> 00:16:21,715
You get a flat tire, you don't go
puncture holes and get flat tires in
360
00:16:21,715 --> 00:16:23,035
all three of your other tires, right?
361
00:16:23,035 --> 00:16:24,835
You just fix the one
flat and you keep going.
362
00:16:24,835 --> 00:16:25,735
So it's the same thing.
363
00:16:25,735 --> 00:16:28,255
You just, you keep going,
you pick yourself back up.
364
00:16:28,345 --> 00:16:28,855
I owned it.
365
00:16:28,855 --> 00:16:29,815
I, I owned it.
366
00:16:29,815 --> 00:16:31,555
I ate a bunch of brownies, right?
367
00:16:31,555 --> 00:16:33,475
I own that and now I'm gonna move on.
368
00:16:33,775 --> 00:16:37,585
So it's the same concept, you know,
whether, again, it's like in in
369
00:16:37,825 --> 00:16:40,465
the business world or your goals
that way, like, you know, like if
370
00:16:40,465 --> 00:16:42,355
you miss, something, okay, great.
371
00:16:42,355 --> 00:16:43,045
You missed it.
372
00:16:43,315 --> 00:16:44,875
You said something messed up.
373
00:16:44,875 --> 00:16:45,265
Right?
374
00:16:45,295 --> 00:16:45,655
Okay.
375
00:16:45,655 --> 00:16:46,195
I'm sorry.
376
00:16:46,195 --> 00:16:48,775
I said that out of, you
know, I was too emotional.
377
00:16:48,775 --> 00:16:50,515
I shouldn't have said that that was wrong.
378
00:16:50,875 --> 00:16:51,625
I'm sorry.
379
00:16:51,895 --> 00:16:53,425
And you move on, right?
380
00:16:53,815 --> 00:16:56,275
You know, in your relationships, right?
381
00:16:56,515 --> 00:16:58,855
Conflict happens all the
time in relationships.
382
00:16:59,425 --> 00:17:02,125
Do you, do people, I mean, maybe
some people, as I'll say, do people
383
00:17:02,130 --> 00:17:03,625
just get divorced over one fight?
384
00:17:03,625 --> 00:17:06,835
I mean, maybe some people do,
but, but no, theoretically, no.
385
00:17:06,835 --> 00:17:07,885
That doesn't usually happen.
386
00:17:09,040 --> 00:17:11,380
, like they're little conflicts
that might happen over time that
387
00:17:11,380 --> 00:17:12,610
kill the relationship, right?
388
00:17:12,610 --> 00:17:14,800
But it's, you keep trying, right?
389
00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:18,490
You don't let one little thing mess
up something really great, right?
390
00:17:18,790 --> 00:17:24,100
You find a way to own up to whatever you
did to communicate and move on, right?
391
00:17:25,960 --> 00:17:30,850
So that's what I really wanted to
get at, was giving yourself grace,
392
00:17:30,880 --> 00:17:35,540
making sure you apologize, and
then forgive yourself, right?
393
00:17:35,590 --> 00:17:36,910
It's forgiveness, right?
394
00:17:36,910 --> 00:17:40,210
Forgiveness is really hard, whether
you're forgiving somebody that
395
00:17:40,215 --> 00:17:43,750
wronged you who didn't even give you
an apology, but I think it's even
396
00:17:43,755 --> 00:17:45,610
harder sometimes to forgive ourselves.
397
00:17:46,120 --> 00:17:49,520
So I really am asking you if there's
anything that you're holding onto
398
00:17:50,860 --> 00:17:54,040
about yourself, that you're beating
yourself up about something that maybe
399
00:17:54,040 --> 00:17:57,130
happened in your past, or it happened
last week, or it happened this morning.
400
00:17:58,300 --> 00:17:58,840
Move on.
401
00:17:58,845 --> 00:17:59,230
Forgive.
402
00:18:00,805 --> 00:18:01,675
And move on.
403
00:18:01,825 --> 00:18:03,505
How can you move forward from this?
404
00:18:03,535 --> 00:18:03,985
Right?
405
00:18:04,465 --> 00:18:05,455
That's what it's all about.
406
00:18:05,455 --> 00:18:09,145
It's about learning what you need
to learn and moving on and growing.
407
00:18:09,150 --> 00:18:13,495
And once you grow, once you
learn better, you do better.
408
00:18:13,975 --> 00:18:17,215
And it's a way for you to pick
yourself back up and keep climbing
409
00:18:17,215 --> 00:18:18,595
those rungs of energy, right?
410
00:18:18,595 --> 00:18:23,605
Like to just vibe high and attract higher
vibrational opportunities back to you.
411
00:18:23,605 --> 00:18:24,115
Right?
412
00:18:24,445 --> 00:18:27,235
You don't need to sulk and you don't
need to go to that downward spiral.
413
00:18:27,265 --> 00:18:30,245
That helps no one.
414
00:18:30,275 --> 00:18:30,655
Okay.
415
00:18:31,035 --> 00:18:33,315
another thing I guess I really
wanna say is that you know,
416
00:18:33,315 --> 00:18:34,545
you guys are never alone.
417
00:18:34,935 --> 00:18:35,445
Okay?
418
00:18:35,685 --> 00:18:36,825
You're never alone.
419
00:18:37,255 --> 00:18:42,400
You're not, like there is a whole
other plane of existence of people
420
00:18:42,610 --> 00:18:44,110
waiting for you to call on them.
421
00:18:44,110 --> 00:18:46,240
You've got angels and
guides like they're there.
422
00:18:46,240 --> 00:18:47,470
You just have to ask.
423
00:18:47,830 --> 00:18:49,720
You just have to ask for that help.
424
00:18:50,260 --> 00:18:51,280
Um, and they're waiting.
425
00:18:51,280 --> 00:18:53,620
They're there for you to help guide
you and help you feel supported,
426
00:18:53,620 --> 00:18:54,820
like in your moments of weakness.
427
00:18:54,820 --> 00:18:58,030
If you're feeling weak and you need
some, like, just help, like ask
428
00:18:58,030 --> 00:19:01,840
for it and then don't be surprised
when a miracle shows up for you.
429
00:19:03,475 --> 00:19:06,805
Um, actually on that point, I
actually do have a little miracle
430
00:19:06,805 --> 00:19:08,155
story that I can share with you.
431
00:19:08,405 --> 00:19:13,275
um, before I went to bed, uh,
one of the nights earlier this
432
00:19:13,275 --> 00:19:14,985
week, I asked my dad to visit me.
433
00:19:15,715 --> 00:19:17,335
And I went to bed and.
434
00:19:18,580 --> 00:19:21,100
, you know, it was one of the dreams
right before I woke up and he was there.
435
00:19:21,370 --> 00:19:26,230
He was there and he was walking and
he danced and, um, he was wearing his,
436
00:19:26,290 --> 00:19:29,500
uh, Letterman jacket, which is what
he actually asked to be buried in.
437
00:19:29,500 --> 00:19:35,320
So, um, it was wonderful and
it was just so amazing to see
438
00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:36,580
him show up for me like that.
439
00:19:36,580 --> 00:19:39,700
And, um, it was one of those things
where I think he knew that I was
440
00:19:39,700 --> 00:19:41,560
ready and okay to have him show up.
441
00:19:42,175 --> 00:19:44,065
and visit me in that context.
442
00:19:44,065 --> 00:19:44,395
Right.
443
00:19:44,395 --> 00:19:46,915
And it just, it was really magical
and it was really good to see him.
444
00:19:46,915 --> 00:19:50,215
And I think it was also awesome that
he showed me himself walking, right?
445
00:19:50,220 --> 00:19:54,325
Like he was walking and he was dancing,
and, um, so that was really cool.
446
00:19:54,325 --> 00:19:55,225
That was really amazing to see.
447
00:19:55,225 --> 00:19:58,735
So, um, I mean, I share that
because that was, and to me it was.
448
00:19:59,215 --> 00:20:00,415
Somewhat of a miracle, right?
449
00:20:00,415 --> 00:20:02,905
And, and it just goes to show you,
like, you just have to ask and
450
00:20:02,910 --> 00:20:05,845
then be open to receiving and just
don't be surprised when stuff shows
451
00:20:05,845 --> 00:20:08,035
up like that for you, you know?
452
00:20:08,335 --> 00:20:12,565
Um, in whatever context it
is, you know, it happens.
453
00:20:12,570 --> 00:20:14,455
I mean, it would happen in
my real estate career too.
454
00:20:14,455 --> 00:20:18,145
Like, you know, I would, I mean,
things happen, miracles happen, and
455
00:20:18,145 --> 00:20:22,090
you just really again, have to ask
for it, and be open to receiving it.
456
00:20:22,090 --> 00:20:25,180
I mean, same thing like manifesting all
that stuff that I've talked about before.
457
00:20:25,180 --> 00:20:26,830
Like it's real, it's here.
458
00:20:26,830 --> 00:20:29,140
You just have to believe it.
459
00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:32,140
When you believe it, you'll see it
and you know, when you welcome it,
460
00:20:32,170 --> 00:20:34,090
it'll, it'll come to you, it'll arrive.
461
00:20:34,090 --> 00:20:36,160
So, um, so yeah.
462
00:20:36,160 --> 00:20:36,820
So that's a lot.
463
00:20:36,820 --> 00:20:40,720
I feel like I'm gonna, I'll keep going,
so I should probably just wrap it up.
464
00:20:40,750 --> 00:20:44,110
Um, but I hope you guys
are doing well, right?
465
00:20:44,140 --> 00:20:47,170
Um, You know, life is hard, right?
466
00:20:47,410 --> 00:20:52,630
And, um, it's all about just moving
forward and what you can do, what you can
467
00:20:52,630 --> 00:20:56,830
learn, and what you can, um, grow from
each experience that you have, you know?
468
00:20:57,130 --> 00:20:59,070
So, please let me know.
469
00:20:59,075 --> 00:21:00,240
I would love to hear from you.
470
00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:03,000
I love so much when I get,
messages back from people
471
00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:04,050
who've listened to the podcast.
472
00:21:04,050 --> 00:21:07,805
It means the world to me, so
please never hesitate, send me
473
00:21:07,805 --> 00:21:10,170
a DM on Facebook or Instagram.
474
00:21:10,170 --> 00:21:15,360
My handle is @chelsea.vanbuskirk let
me know if there's something that you
475
00:21:15,360 --> 00:21:17,430
needed to let go or forgive yourself for.
476
00:21:17,490 --> 00:21:17,730
Right.
477
00:21:17,730 --> 00:21:18,150
Let me know.
478
00:21:18,150 --> 00:21:21,600
You don't have to tell me what it is if
you don't want to, but just I wanna know
479
00:21:21,600 --> 00:21:24,360
if that was something that was helpful
for you to know, to realize that you
480
00:21:24,360 --> 00:21:28,020
needed to let go and forgive yourself or
something so that you can move on and move
481
00:21:28,020 --> 00:21:30,450
forward and start raising yourself back up
482
00:21:30,450 --> 00:21:30,840
right.
483
00:21:31,740 --> 00:21:31,950
Right?
484
00:21:31,950 --> 00:21:33,850
You don't have to run, just crawl for now.
485
00:21:34,270 --> 00:21:34,770
It's fine.
486
00:21:34,785 --> 00:21:37,965
Just keep moving forward,
learn something, right, grow.
487
00:21:37,965 --> 00:21:38,745
It's okay.
488
00:21:39,435 --> 00:21:40,425
So let me know.
489
00:21:40,425 --> 00:21:41,505
I hope all is well.
490
00:21:41,635 --> 00:21:45,055
You can find me on the website,
chelseavanbuskirk.com and yeah,
491
00:21:45,115 --> 00:21:46,195
I'll see you guys next week.
492
00:21:46,675 --> 00:21:47,155
Peace.